Personal New Year

Note: Most people tend to do their reflections on New Years Eve. It is the time when resolutions are born; goals are determined for the year, and boozy reflections are made.  I prefer to do this around the time of my birthday.  It feels more personal and allows me to take my accomplishments, mistakes, and all that I’ve learned into account.

There are two types of calendar years, the one we all follow that begins on January first and one that begins each year on one’s birthday.  While she used the first for appointments and classes, she followed the latter when it came to making resolutions and crossing items off her bucket list.  This year was a milestone year for her.  She’d woken up each morning for the past two years, subconsciously gritting her teeth.  Accompanied by a heavy sigh, she would place her feet on the ground and stand up.  As time progressed, getting out of bed became harder and harder, sighs became sobs, and gritted teeth became clenched fists.  Unclenching her fists, she reached out for knowledge and begged for relief.  She knew that gaining knowledge on how to help herself would result in relief.

Time continued to move forward; the seasons changed, and sobs transformed into sighs.  Sighs developed into smiles, and soon enough, the smiles returned on a daily basis.  As smiles became a part of her daily life again and laughter crept its way back into her good graces, she was grateful for the help she had along the way.  Her recovery has been a group effort and she loves them for it.  As the past two years draw to a close, she has reflected on how far she’s come. This birthday marks the start of a new chapter, and for the first time in two years it would begin with the word “happily.”

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